I hope y’all don’t mind that I’m cross-posting this from my blog, but I’d appreciate some supportive discussion about this topic. I don’t know about you, but as a minster it ain’t easy for me to confess publicly that I feel that I’m sucking at an important area of my ministry.
No, this isn’t another post on how some evangelicals and fundamentalists have a Trekkie Faith. It’s a post where I invite you into a struggle I’ve been having with prayer, and this time it’s not a struggle with my personal prayer life (that’s another post). My struggle has been with leading prayers in worship, specifically the Prayers of the People.
For a long time I’ve used the selection of prayers from the Book of Common Worship. The wording of those prayers is generally really good. It is clear with a slightly poetic feel, and I believe there is value in the congregation hearing some of the same prayers repeatedly. It’s my hope that as they hear certain Prayers of the People from the BCW, that words and phrases will stick in their memory and help them develop their own prayer vocabulary.
I still believe in the positive aspects of the BCW prayers, but I don’t think I can do them anymore. I just don’t feel that they are connecting to the congregation. It seems to me that most people are tuning out of this time of prayer until they hear the lead-in to the Lords Prayer. So the last couple times I’ve tried to do the Prayers of the People extemporaneously. The idea behind this is that if I’m not reading the prayer, but just praying it on the spot then I’ll be able to connect more with the congregation because I’ll be able to “say what’s on my heart” rather than what is in a book.
I know there are several problems with this way of thinking. Not that it is completely wrong, but it’s not completely right either. And frankly, it hasn’t worked. I’ve been so nervous about saying the right thing and not screwing up that I haven’t really felt that the prayer has been from my heart. Instead it has been from my mind and my worries as I nervously try to make it sound like I’m connecting without too many umms and awkward pauses.
So as I am getting ready to do the Prayers this Sunday I turned to the BCW – not to get a prayer to read, but to read about the prayer. What is it and why do we do it? So as I was reading one phrase jumped out at me: “The prayers are to be offered in a manner that engages the people in prayer.” Yes! This is what I am trying to do. Engage! (said in my best Picard voice).
So how do you engage people in prayer? How do you engage people at all?
I’m sure there are all sorts of answers to this, but I think they all begin with relationship. In order to offer prayers on behalf of my congregation I need to have relationships with them and call upon our connections as I pray. I need to feel the need to go to God with our individual and mutual concerns, joys and petitions. Not because I’m the minister and it’s my job, but because these are my brothers and sisters and I want God’s will for them with all my heart.
Sounds good, right? But how does that happen? At 11:45 on Sunday morning, as I’m standing behind a table, up a couple steps, in my ceremonial vestments, head bowed in front of a quiet and somewhat bored congregation, how do I connect with a couple hundred people in a way that is genuine? Given that I’m an Associate Pastor in a traditional church, it’s not really in my power to change a whole lot of the setting or structure of our worship.
Maybe it shows what an uncaring minister/person I am if I have to ask questions like this. I suppose care and concern for the people of my church should just overflow from me week after week. But for whatever reason they don’t, at least not to the degree that I can stand up front each Sunday while passionate prayers form on my lips as easily as I breathe.
So how do I/we engage?
Over a decade ago I went through what you’re experiencing, for much of the same reasons. At first, I thought the BCW was great. Then after a few years of using it, it seemed a bit stiff. It took me time to become comfortable praying aloud extemporaneously, but it came with practice.
Let’s make an important distinction, though, between pastoral prayers and prayers of the people.
A pastoral prayer is a prayer prayed by you, the pastor, and the people are listening in on your conversation with God. The congregation might be (and usually is) the second intended audience for the prayer, but the originator of the supplications and intercessions is you. You’re praying in your words, with your style, according to the way you see things. When it’s the pastoral prayer, pray out loud to your heart’s content, knowing that it is part of your gift — your self-giving — to the congregation. You are praying your love for them, and you are praying your desire that they will love God, each other, and the world.
It’s a different matter when you’re leading prayers of the people. These are their prayers, and this time you’re listening in on their conversation with God. Far from being a person who gives the people words, your role is now to be an encourager of and a witness to the people’s words. This is why, historically, prayers of the people are led by deacons and not clergy. A deacon, one of the laity, prays out loud on behalf of the people, and the people give their assent through a brief litany, such as
deacon: Lord, in your mercy,
people: hear our prayer.
If your congregation has no deacons and you, or an elder, are willing to fulfill that role, you can lead extemporaneous prayers of the people through careful and intentional work.
I know, I know! When I stepped back from what I just wrote, I saw the oxymoron, too. “Extemporaneous” and “intentional” sound contradictory in the same sentence, but they both need to be there. It takes intentional work to lead people to a point where they will share their prayers extemporaneously.
This is part of the advantage I have as pastor of a small church. I can tell the congregation, “I’ll start and end the prayer, but you’re going to fill the middle of it,” and they’ll do it because everyone knows everyone else and the embarrassment factor isn’t the same as it is in a large church. Also, we can spend five minutes in prayer and that allows enough time to voice most of the concerns in the room. Try that in a congregation of even as few as 200 and the prayer could last until lunch, or longer!
So what are some ideas for how to do this in a medium to large church? Prayer request slips are a well known option. Collect them from the congregation earlier in the service and read them aloud during prayers of the people.
I think there’s a better option, though. I advocate worship teams to prepare the liturgy. I believe, no matter how large or small a church is, the people need to be involved in their worship of God. That’s what liturgy means: lait (people) + ourgeia (work). Liturgy is “the work of the people.”
Here’s one way it could take shape. Recruit some congregants to meet with you and pray aloud in a small group weeks, or even months, ahead of time. (This is the intentionality I spoke of earlier.) As they become more comfortable praying extemporaneously together, have them write down the essence of those prayers to be read aloud by you, a deacon, an elder, or one of them on Sunday as prayers of the people. After they have heard their words spoken aloud for a few months, ask the group to join you in praying extemporaneously during the worship service. Agree ahead of time to pray in turn, one after the other. By this point, they will simply be doing within the sanctuary what they have been doing within their small group.
Perhaps this idea may not fly, but it might give wings to another idea.
Interesting thoughts. I’m pastoring a pretty small congregation..45 in worship or so…and our prayers of the people are immediately preceded by a time for sharing joys and concerns. Rather than opening a prayer and asking folks to pitch in, we have prayer immediately afterwards. That means that you have a chance to hear some of the more pressing spiritual and emotional needs articulated by the congregation…and can fold them into your prayer.
Moving away from prepared prayer in those circumstances is important…while I really appreciate the depth of some of the BCW prayers, and draw inspiration from them, being able to express things in a less-generic way is essential.
More silence helps me as we begin to pray. The prepared prayers are a good foundation. I use one and tailor it to what is going on in the life of the church local and global.
I have also taken to reading more poetry and writing prayers daily. Prayer is an art. We have been imbued with creativity by our Creator to create.
Blessings on this endeavor.
Do you find that by sharing prayer praises, thanksgivings, and concerns, and then having prayer based on that sharing (which can often be lengthy, akin to a support group therapy session)is repetitive?
One church I’ve been to has a “prayer request” log, into which prayer requests are written. The pastor then incoporates the requests into the pastoral prayer.
What think ye?
I find the best thing I can during the Prayers of the People is to just shut up. I always allow a time of silence (I shoot for at least two minutes… want to talk about the need for discipline try standing silently at the pulpit for two minutes) so people can just be in the moment. I frame the time with a prayer that refers back to themes within the sermon, community concerns, and then usually bring everyone back with a concluding prayer from the BCW. This is one of two times we are silent during our service, the other being a period before we confess our sins.
In addition to what has already been said, I would also offer that we need to spend extended time meditating on Scripture. I pray extemporaneously but have made it a discipline to “pray the Scriptures”. I am pretty intentional about weaving the joys and concerns of my congregation in with the language of Scripture and it seems to connect very well with my folks. They respond very well to the prayers, talk about how personal yet powerful they seem to be, and how much they love that particular time of the service. I also do the same with our unison reading of the prayer of confession. I use one of the lectionary texts and craft it to our situation, what we as a congregation are dealing with and need to confess. One of the reasons I don’t like the prayers in the BCW is that they are so general which makes sense because they are prayers written without a context. So if you are going to continue to use them, I think there needs to be revision made based on what your community is experiencing.
I have always found asking for prayer requests helpful in the organizaton of the pastoral prayer. I am sure the larger the congregation that more difficult it is to include as many people as you might wish. Primarily these prayers are intercessory in nature, but they speak of the hurt, as well as the joy of the people.
I found the word “bored” in your description of the congregation. It is difficult to engage in prayers with the congregation if this prejudgment is hidden in your subconcious. Prayers emerge from the depth of real living and will not come if the pastor is not listening keenly to the lives of the congregation and the circumstances of the community.
I have found it helpful to think in terms of Jung’s archtypes when praying and preaching. Peope share common characteristics which God hears in his acts of healing and restoration. Prayer is formative both for the person offering the prayer, and for those who are engaged through sharing and listening.
One of my contributions to the ministry of our congregation is to lead a short meeting expressly for the purpose of prayer. Here’s a description of the format and intent of the meeting: http://paul.dubuc.org/2007/09/01/prayer-at-six/
One of the primary things I try to do as leader is to engage people in prayer. This format has worked pretty well, I think. Silence starts the meeting to help people focus or center themselves on God. With a short devotional message on some aspect of prayer I try to draw people in to the experience and encourage them to express themselves in prayer along the lines of the meditation or scripture reading. I begin and end the time with extemporaneous prayer and pray along with them in the middle when we offer up requests. Sometimes I read prepared prayers (either my own or those of others) but not often.
I think what helps me most is spending time the day before in prayer focusing on the next day’s meeting and asking God to help me guide it. I try to get to the meeting a half hour early in order to have time to set things up and to spend at least 15 or 20 minutes praying before the meeting. Sometimes I feel very ill prepared in spite of all this. Sometimes I am unable to, or remiss in, preparing adequately. Whether I feel that I am well prepared or not I try to remind myself that the effectiveness of the meeting depends on God’s presence, not mine. I try to “let go” of the meeting before it starts. We are there to meet with God and it is up to him to “show up.” Awkward silences (as well intentional, solemn ones) and stumbling over or groping for words are all a natural part of the effort we make to pray. Our goal should not be to eliminate them completely. No amount of preparation should ever put us in the place of not having to depend on God having his way with the meeting. There have been many times when things have gone very well beyond my abilities or preparation, a literally awesome and humbling experience, worth waiting through the times when God doesn’t seem to “show up” as much. Prayer is our spiritual life’s blood. Half the struggle is taking that belief seriously.
It’s hard to add much to what’s already been said. I have gone through and continue to go through a very similar struggle as I often lead the Prayers of the People in my church. As the new AP, I’d say it falls to me %40 of the time. I grew up with extemporaneous prayers, believing written prayers were right up there with genuflecting and denial of the cup – popery and signs of the apocalypse. I’ve since come around, but can’t quite get myself to simply recite someone else’s prayers (BCW, etc). I end up writing short prayers that are usually inspired by Scripture and include a couple of recent (I hit up Google News 30 min before worship) world events. I often end with silence, aiming for 30-45 seconds.
Oddly enough, I sometimes feel like the “world concerns” are more news to the congregation than anything else – but in our context (central Ohio, where if it’s not Scarlet & Grey, it doesn’t get play) it fits. And I think that’s the biggest component in this – what is your context? How do the people NEED you to pray for them? Or do they? You were dead on about relationships. And be free to experiment – as an AP, you can screw up royally – I think that’s in the job description!